Reflection 7

For me taking selfies is something I do not commonly do. I have always felt that I am not the best I could be (ironic since I have appeared in film and TV). I find that in photos I am straining to make myself look happy and not show how I really feel. I have found that in the selfies I choose I am either smiling of making funny faces and this makes up many of my photos. Very few photographs of me are showing how I actually feel in the moment. Since I can remember I have suffered from depression and photos really have not shown how much this effects me in my daily life. Even when interacting with other I hide my depression with humor and even in photos I find using a funny face helps it seem that I am a fun loving person. The first selfie was taken when I met a friend I went to basic training with and went on tour with. We had not seen each other since we came back to the United States and had not been in contact for over a year. This photo shows how we both still had the fun loving attitude that we had in basic training. However, this photo does not show how we both experienced things we never talk about especially to our significant others. We both talk a lot since we met again playing airsoft and use that to help us keep our friendship alive as well as have an outlet. In the second selfie, this photograph is taken during the middle of an airsoft game. I started playing airsoft around five years ago because of my interest in keeping with a quasi-military lifestyle and still having fun doing things outside. This photo shows how much I get into the game. The person who took the photograph literally asked me to turn to look at them during the game so the expression I have is my expression of both concentration and puzzlement. The photo does not show the joy I have when I play airsoft and being able to use some of my skills to use. The final selfie I am using is me doing cosplay as Green Lantern. Although I am more of a marvel person I still am not against DC comic characters. When I cosplay I find that I can be a different person. It is one of the reasons I like voice acing and screen acting too. I find that when I see photographs of me when I am doing a cosplay I am more lively. The cosplays almost seem to give me a clean slate for my personality and I sometimes don't recognize myself in the photographs.